The Worst Wakeup EVER

So on Friday morning I woke up to my very worst nightmare! It was about 7:30 in the morning when I woke up to this strange buzzing noise - a loud buzzing noise. I looked up and there was this Bee-Bird smashing into the window above my head and buzzing away crazily. My heart almost stopped! I grabbed the covers and got completed under the blankets not knowing what to do next.

Sounds kind of silly but believe me I do have my reasons for being so petrified! I am pretty allergic to bees. The first time I found this out was when I was about fifteen my first year as a staff cadet in Penhold. It was at one of the graduation inspections for the kids. I remember I got stung but it was a parade so I couldn't really move or anything. All of a sudden my heart was racing quite a bit and I passed out... next thing I know I woke up at the medical building and they gave me an epipen and told me that I was allergic to bee stings.

I was lucky for a few years because I am pretty smart around bees. Instead of freaking out and swatting at them I just sneak away quietly and slowly... because I KNOW that it is only when the bee gets freaked out that it attacks you! The next time I remember being stung was when my godson Avery was almost one (he is 13 now), we had been at sikome lake all day and I was getting Ave out of his baby seat when all of a sudden I was stung by not one but TWO bees. I had a panic attack and off to the hospital I went again.

So here I am in my worst nightmare stuck under the covers. The only thing I could think of to do as call for the cats hoping that they would attack the strangely large loud creature above my head and give me a chance to escape.

Only little Benji came but the plan worked and I snuck out of the bed and out of the room while Ben attacked and distracted the bee!

I got upstairs and my hands were all shaky and my knees were jelly... I so didn't want to but knew that I had to go back down and kill the damb bee... because I really cannot live with a bee in my bedroom!

I went down and peaked around the bedroom door. Benji was still swatting away at the window so I crept into the room. I looked down and there was the bee-bird thing crawling across the floor... in crawled up to a pillow that was on the floor and then up ONTO the pillow... I'm not kidding this was an very large bee. It then did the strangest thing that I have ever seen... it started to like open and close it's back... then rolled onto it's back. I started to really panic because I started to wonder if it was giving birth or something! Then I started to wonder if maybe it was dying because it looked kind of like a fly does when you spray it with bug spray... I spotted a plastic bag in the corner of the room so I crawled over to it and then back over to the bee. I quickly put a section of the bag over the bee and the fucking thing came to life!

Now I was really scared because it was freaking out and buzzing flat under a plastic bag squished on top of it with a pillow under it... and it was pissed! I tried to suffocate the damb thing but with the pillow under it, it just was not going to happen... I started to really panic because the bee was kind of making progress breaking thru the bag (my hands were on both sides of the bag pressing down keeping it pinned to the pillow at this point) and I knew that if it broke thru I was in trouble!

I got my knee up to where my left hand was pinning down the bag and got my knee on the bag so I could reach for a hard cover book. I took the spine of the book and tried to crush the bee under the bag... but it WOULD NOT WORK because the damb bee was on a PILLOW!!!

By a miracle in his struggle and just before he broke the bag the bee finally wiggled himself in between two folds in the bag so there was plastic bag under him and above him... I got the bag rolled up with the bee stuck inside and raced upstairs to the backdoor... I got the backdoor open and flung the bag outside slamming the door behind me. It was like 8:45 at this point!

I went back downstairs to get dressed and thought I heard a buzz by the window... I snuck over and slowly peeked in between two blinds... sure enought there was another bee in the window sill... I guess that Benji really was swatting one when I came in but not the one that was on the floor! I almost cried but it looked like it was moving slow so I took that same book, placed in sideways in the sill... and dropped in quickly crashing the final bee without much of a fight!

I told my story to a few of the mentors on the youth advisory committee this weekend and one said that maybe there is a nest somewhere in the house... now I am not sure if I can even return and sleep in that room! I tell you one thing though- if they move in... I'm moving out!