Happy Single's Day
Well it's Valentine's Day and my usual Valentine's have moved off to Saskatoon (my godsons)... and well as usual there is no other Valentine even being close to in sight...
Kelly said it perfectly in her Valentine's Day post back in 2001...
2/14/2001
There's an inherent problem with Valentine's Day. It's a day for couple's to celebrate being coupled. However, isn't that what ANNIVERSARIES are for? It's singles that really need the holiday...a day to celebrate being single as there are just no other days to do that "officially". Another problem with the concept of Valentine's Day is that it's a day for couples to give each other presents. Duh...that can be and is done everyday already. Poor singles have no one to give them gifts anyday except the normal holidays like birthdays and Christmas but then the singles have to give to the couples. The way I'm seeing it is that the couples are getting hit with gifts left and right and the singles not only sleep in a cold bed every night but are not getting any consolation gifts either. Lastly, isn't Valentine's Day supposed to be ST. Valentine's Day? If it is then since when would a day about sex and lust be approved of by a saint. I'm pretty sure St. Valentine wasn't getting any booty. I could be wrong about this but it just seems off.
For these above reasons I think that a new and improved holiday should be instituted....I hereby declare February 15th SINGLE'S DAY!!! The rules of Single's Day is as follows:
- Singles must get presents from couples. (they are now tax deductible so big gifts are recommended)
- Singles must be taken out to dinner and must receive flowers from couples (aforementioned couples must be miserable and fight throughout the meal, consistently telling the single that love hurts, love sucks, love bites.
- All couples must refrain from romance and sex on this day in honor of the singles not getting any. (I have no way really of checking up on this but there shall be NO rosy glows emitting from any duos.)
- There should only be ads, tv shows, movies about marital infidelity, spousal abuse, etc. (All day showings of Kramer vs. Kramer, War of the Roses, Madame Butterfly and Sally Jesse Raphael are approved watching.)
I need to come up with a graphic symbol or branding to combat the dastardly hearts and roses symbol...any ideas?
So this is it and seeing that I'm the one to originate this day I must be revered and worshipped and the day must be unofficially called St. Kelly's Day.
Kelly said it perfectly in her Valentine's Day post back in 2001...
2/14/2001
There's an inherent problem with Valentine's Day. It's a day for couple's to celebrate being coupled. However, isn't that what ANNIVERSARIES are for? It's singles that really need the holiday...a day to celebrate being single as there are just no other days to do that "officially". Another problem with the concept of Valentine's Day is that it's a day for couples to give each other presents. Duh...that can be and is done everyday already. Poor singles have no one to give them gifts anyday except the normal holidays like birthdays and Christmas but then the singles have to give to the couples. The way I'm seeing it is that the couples are getting hit with gifts left and right and the singles not only sleep in a cold bed every night but are not getting any consolation gifts either. Lastly, isn't Valentine's Day supposed to be ST. Valentine's Day? If it is then since when would a day about sex and lust be approved of by a saint. I'm pretty sure St. Valentine wasn't getting any booty. I could be wrong about this but it just seems off.
For these above reasons I think that a new and improved holiday should be instituted....I hereby declare February 15th SINGLE'S DAY!!! The rules of Single's Day is as follows:
- Singles must get presents from couples. (they are now tax deductible so big gifts are recommended)
- Singles must be taken out to dinner and must receive flowers from couples (aforementioned couples must be miserable and fight throughout the meal, consistently telling the single that love hurts, love sucks, love bites.
- All couples must refrain from romance and sex on this day in honor of the singles not getting any. (I have no way really of checking up on this but there shall be NO rosy glows emitting from any duos.)
- There should only be ads, tv shows, movies about marital infidelity, spousal abuse, etc. (All day showings of Kramer vs. Kramer, War of the Roses, Madame Butterfly and Sally Jesse Raphael are approved watching.)
I need to come up with a graphic symbol or branding to combat the dastardly hearts and roses symbol...any ideas?
So this is it and seeing that I'm the one to originate this day I must be revered and worshipped and the day must be unofficially called St. Kelly's Day.
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